A mom from New Jersey is going viral for her raw and unfiltered list of postpartum advice she wishes she could have given herself three years ago.
Bee De La Cruz (@beedelacruzz), as she’s called on social media, didn’t sugarcoat the postpartum experience in her Instagram reel.
The actress-turned-teacher, 37, told Newsweek the post was inspired by her own journey to motherhood.
“Everyone told me to prepare for the baby…but no one told me I’d have to grieve myself,” the millennial said. “I found myself in a never-ending loop where time dragged on forever as well as disappeared right in front of me, speaking in Ms Rachel’s voice even to my husband, with perpetual cold coffee on the counter and a pile of laundry I couldn’t touch in days.”
De La Cruz’s advice ranges from the practical tips: “You don’t need more baby gear. You need more sleep, sunlight, and boundaries”, to deeply emotional: “Stop waiting to feel like your old self—she’s gone. Mourn her, then meet the new you.”
Embracing the new version of herself wasn’t easy. “I realized I kept chasing a version of myself that didn’t exist anymore,” she told Newsweek. “I realized I was grieving a ghost; a ghost that I let myself mourn. I lit a metaphorical candle, cried for her, honored her—and then I let her go. And you know what, the new me? She doesn’t have it all together but she’s wiser, she’s stronger.”
De La Cruz’s reel, which has been viewed 2.4 million times, resonated with moms across the internet.
Hundreds left applause emojis as a symbol of praise and understanding in the comments section.
“Wow, didn’t expect to cry today. This is so powerful and I hope it makes all mamas feel seen the way I just felt seen,” one user wrote.
“Best advice I’ve gotten so far about this journey,” another added.
De La Cruz told Newsweek the reaction has been validating.
“The amount of women that have interacted and commented and said that they felt seen by my words was so gratifying because it made me realize that I am not insane and…this is not talked about it enough,” she said.
As for what’s next, she said she’ll keep sharing. “Now, I build forward and that’s the energy I want every mom to find. I’m not a coach. I’m not a guru. I’m just a mom who got up one more time than she stayed down. And if I can drag myself through postpartum hell, I’ll damn sure leave breadcrumbs for the next mama.”
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