A woman is being overwhelmingly backed online for not letting her friend’s husband attend her “Galentine’s Day” party.
Galentine’s Day, as previously covered by Newsweek, is an unofficial holiday celebrating female platonic friendships that falls on February 13 (the day before Valentine’s Day).
It was introduced in 2010 on a season two episode of the NBC sitcom “Parks and Recreation,” in which Amy Poehler’s character Leslie Knope—the mastermind behind Galentine’s—described the holiday as: “Only the best day of the year. Every February 13, my lady friends and I leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home, and we just come and kick it, breakfast style.
“Ladies celebrating ladies.”
Ultimatum
With that spirit in mind, the 29-year-old woman and original poster (OP) in this case, Reddit user Fluffyycatt, throws a Galentine’s party—with wine, appetizers and games—for a handful of her girlfriends every year, she explained in her post on January 16.
However, per the OP’s post, after she texted the group about this year’s Galentine’s get-together, one of her besties—a 32-year-old woman who married last spring—got back to her with an ultimatum.
“My friend messaged me privately to say that if her husband can’t come, she can’t come and asked if he could come with her,” the OP wrote in her discussion-sparking post on the forum, which has racked up 4,000 upvotes and more than 700 responses.
“I normally would welcome him, but no one else’s husband or boyfriends will be there and it just isn’t that kind of party [laugh out loud].
“I told her that no one else’s partners would be there and she said that since being married they are a ‘package’ deal and only attend things together. I told her I respected whatever arrangements they had in their marriage and if she wasn’t able to attend, I understood.
‘I was being rude’
“However, a few days later a mutual friend told me that they talked and she said she was hurt by the fact I wouldn’t invite him and felt I was being rude. I do plan to talk to her about it…”
The conflicted OP—while requesting online feedback—expressed that she thought she had made the right decision at first, but had grown worried that her friend may have been right about her choice.
Many Redditors, though, urged the OP to stop questioning herself.
One of the users who took the OP’s side, for instance, replied to her post: “It’s literally the one thing that’s about supporting female friendships lol. Read the room, no boys allowed.”
A second similarly defended the OP: “Your house. Your party. Your rules. It’s not as if you haven’t hosted this party in the past and the expectations aren’t known.”
‘Controlling behavior’
A third chimed in: “I’m a bit worried about them being a ‘package deal.’ Like they can never go anywhere unless they go together? Admittedly I don’t know the details, but this sounds like unhealthy controlling behavior.”
And a fourth urged her to: “Stand your ground here, make the boundaries clear.”
The various supportive comments throughout the thread seem to have reassured the OP, who thanked everyone who responded.
“I had a lot of anxiety about this,” she said, adding, “I knew I had done the ‘right’ thing in my head. But then I second guessed myself. Now I feel good in the boundaries I set.”
Interested in also celebrating Galentine’s Day? Newsweek once highlighted some of the best ways to do so—from brunch to a movie night to a gift exchange and more.
Newsweek contacted Fluffyycatt for comment via Reddit.
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